Secrets of my heart...

Something I didn't expect as a dr.s wife is....(drum roll please)... jealousy. I'm super comfortable in my roll as wife and mother, don't get me wrong, and really, I wouldn't have it any other way. But I've realized just this year that sometimes I envy my husband's success. He's kinda important in his field, an officer of a big national organization, knows important people (even got a big- name doctor to be the voice on his voicemail)... And I'm proud of him. He rocks his world, and he rocks my world. But still, that little seed of jealousy creeps in, wishing that I got awards and pins every time I made it through the grocery store with three kids, wishing I got high fives from my kids every time I prepare a meal or pull out fruit leathers from my purse, wishing I could hang plaques on my wall every year for being mom of the year....can you relate? But it just doesn't work that way. And I have accepted that, for sure. This work of motherhood has long term results, and some results that I will never personally see. It's no instant rewards career, and I don't get a performance review (but really, I don't want a performance review...then all my flaws would be immortalized, I definitely don't need that!). I have to "settle" for the sweet wet kisses from my son, the last snuggle and extra squeeze from each of my kids at night, the sighs they breath when they are finally home and that's where they want to be...these are the good things I work for. And really, my husband should be jealous of me....