Going the Extra Mile

by Mary Cassatt

People sometimes wonder if I've ever been nervous or worried about the fact that my husband spends most of his time with other women.  Let's face it, the ob/gyn world is becoming more and more dominated by female practitioners.  Often, in each class of residents there will be no males at all!  And then of course, he never, ever, ever has a male patient.  And while there are many male nurses in many fields, it seems like most of the labor and delivery nurses are female.  So this question is quite a valid one.

Thankfully, I completely trust my husband, and always have.  He's a faithful man, and has proven to me time and again how madly in love he is with me!  I've never doubted his character, ever.  And often I can't relate to women that have to wonder about their husbands; but believe me, my sympathies abound to them.

But over the years, my husband and I have made special efforts to ensure that other people know he's a married man...that he is totally and utterly unavailable!  Back when he was in residency, and on call many a night, we wouldn't see him for quite a long spell.  So we had to come up with a way to make this time go faster, to encourage him in his work, and to remind his co-workers that he had a family back home.

So I started cooking up big meals, packing them in the car, and driving up to the hospital. I'd stuff the meals in the bottom of the stroller, and push it all the way up to labor and delivery.  My daughter would make her rounds visiting the nurses,  I'd chat it up with the other residents, and then we'd set up our dinner and eat it with Daddy.  Sometimes I'd make enough for his whole team, and sometimes just enough for our little family.  Either way, it was one way for them to see him as a family man, and not as a "potential."  And of course, the added benefit was that it was a special way to love my husband.

We still carry on this tradition from time to time, although with our growing family it's a bit more of a challenge for me to haul everyone up to the hospital.  So sometimes he'll take one child with him to the hospital on his weekend rounds.  Either way, I think it's a good plan to show others that this man is taken!